


Phone a Friend

by Katanachan



Category: South Park
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Angst, Best Friends, Butters Stotch - Freeform, Butters is amazing, Crenny, Crush, Death, Depression, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Friendship, Implied Past Creek, Kenny McCormick - Freeform, Kenny has a crush, Kenny loves his best friend, M/M, Misunderstandings, Mutual Pining, Phone Call, Pining, best friend bunny, bunny - Freeform, craig tucker - Freeform, dealing with death, dealing with depression, not romantic bunny
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-17
Updated: 2018-09-04
Packaged: 2019-04-24 03:14:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,739
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14346819
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Katanachan/pseuds/Katanachan
Summary: When you have no one else to reach out to, always count on your best friend for some helpful advice.Thank you Emmlire, for always being there for me. This is dedicated to you.





	1. Phone a Friend

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Emmlire](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Emmlire/gifts).



“I feel like if I stopped existing, no one would care.” Kenny pauses, imagining his friends bewildered face. “I mean. You’d care and I don’t know, maybe Craig would care, but everyone else would just get over it.” The blond smiles in a bittersweet way that doesn’t quite reach his eyes, they’re glazed over, staring into nothing and everything all at once. It’s a good thing Butters can’t see him, or he was sure the shorter boy would try to hug the pain out of his eyes.  
  
“If I died tomorrow, they’d just replace me.” He laughs and touches his index finger, picking at the skin that’s threatening to rip off at his cuticle. “Heh, technically they have already.”  
  
Butters’ listens to him quietly, unsure what to really say to this. Kenny doesn’t generally call him this late at night and when he does it’s not normally such a morbid conversation. He’s worried something may have happened to set him off but he doesn’t know the words to use to comfort him. The boy opens his mouth to try anyway, knowing Kenny needs him to say something.  
  
“You do so much for people and I think they forget that, Kenny.” He hears himself speaking before he even knows what he’s saying. “But people get so tied up in their own stuff… they forget to care sometimes. That’s all.”  
  
Kenny laughs on the other end of the phone, it sounds wrong and tinny and Butters thinks maybe it’s the phones fault and maybe it’s not. Kenny sounds empty, hollowed out, like he’s given all he can and he has nothing else to give.

“Mmm, I feel like it would suck for them for a second, but people would move on.” Kenny answers, he’s moving and Butters can hear him shuffling around. Kenny sits on his windowsill; the sky outside of his room looks bright and beautiful, full of hope and potential. Too bad that isn’t for him.

“I feel forgotten. I feel used. I feel...” The blond leaves the words hanging like the skin on his finger, left to dangle in the world half attached and half removed.  
  
“Kenny you aren’t forgotten, everyone loves you—you’re amazing.” Butters chimes in his most soothing voice, but he knows it’s falling on deaf ears. When Kenny gets like this; nothing will calm him down, well, maybe talking to Craig.  
  
“Have you called Craig?” He asks, worry lacing through his tone. “I’m sure he’d come over an’ talk to you, Kenny.”

“He’s with Tweek.” Kenny slips and Butters can tell he didn’t mean to say it so quickly, that underlining jealousy is clear in his voice. His best friend is much easier to read when it’s just the two of them and he scrunches his nose at the reaction.  
  
“So? Does that mean ya’ can’t talk to him?”  
  
He sounds annoyed and Kenny feels the pull of his lips into a frown. Leave it to Butters to make a complicated situation sound much easier than it is.  
  
“I can’t just…” Kenny starts, but Butters cuts him off in a stern voice.  
  
“Can’t what now? Interrupt them?”  
  
There’s a pause before Butters continues, a heavy sigh in his voice. “You need to give yourself a break, Kenny. You can’t keep going like this. You’re starting to slip.”  
  
This catches Kenny off guard, his eyes narrowing into the vast darkness of the cosmos above. Butters was always much smarter than other people gave him credit for, why did they ever think he was naïve?  
  
“You’re so good at catching my bullshit.” Kenny barks out, a laugh following the words. “Slipping indeed.”  
  
He thinks about this, thinks about how many times this week he’s tried to talk to his friends about his issues. How they seem like they’re listening before they turn back into mind-less puppets that don’t quite care. How Stan would blankly look at him when he tried to explain what happened the other morning when his foot got stuck in the grate and the bus hit him.  
  
_Ah, but that’s not their fault._ The little voice in the back of his head crows, _It’s the curse isn’t it?_

But it feels like more. It feels like if you died for real, none of them would care. He’s died so many times already and they already don’t seem to care, but if he died for _real,_ ah well, there it is.  
  
Butters is talking again and Kenny zones back into the conversation. “What is it you want to change?”  
  
Kenny grips the phone, “What?” He asks, worried about what the other boy had originally asked.

“I said you have to look to yourself and decide what you needs to change. Because this isn’t working, Kenny, you gotta do something different.”  
  
His sandy hair blows in the wind as he takes this information in, _something different?_  
  
“Well, I think you should start by tellin’ Craig that you got a big ole gay crush on him.” Butters continues, though he can hear Kenny’s sputter on the other end.  
  
He isn’t sure how this topic came up when he called the paler of the two to talk about how replaceable he felt, but here they were.  
  
“You gotta be the change in ya’ life, Kenny. You can’t expect other people to do it for you.”  
  
“This isn’t about how I feel for Tucker, Buttercup. This is how I feel like no one gives two tits about me.” Kenny can feel his face darken a little as he admits his feelings out loud, both types of feelings.  
  
“Gosh Kenny, you help so much and you just seem to think they may give back what you put in, but people aren’t always like that. Yah gotta realize your expectations of them might be high, right? You’re holding them by your own standards when I mean, yah put a lot on yourself.” Butters pauses before he adds, “An’ I think you gotta just talk to him, it’s awfully sad that you think he wouldn’t care. If… if ya know, you went away.”  
  
The stars were twinkling bright above him but he could only see the blurred view of them through his tears. They roll uncontrollably and unwanted down his face, his hand covering his mouth so not to allow the sobs to be heard by his friend.

Why was it Butters always knew what to say?

Why was he so lucky to have a friend like him?

“You uh, you going to major in psychology there, Buttercup?” Kenny sniffs, trying to bring humor into a situation where it didn’t belong.

A chuckle comes from the other end as Butters rolls his eyes, “Naw. I like cookin’ too much, think I’m gonna stick with culinary. But that’s mighty nice of you to say, Kenny.” Another beat passes, “But you're deflectin'.” He adds and Kenny lets out a soft laugh at that.

“Touchè, Buttercup.”

“Now don’tcha go using no fancy French words on me, Kenny McCormick. One of my first girlfriends was from Canada and she taught me all sorts of French.”  
  
The tone of his voice was just so insulted that Kenny can’t help but laugh; he tries to balance himself on the sill but feels strongly that if he fell, hell, that would be okay. But he doesn’t allow it to happen. Not when he’s on the phone with Butters.  
  
“I’ll call him.” He states finally as he steps inside of the window into his room and scrubs his face. “Just because I’m afraid you might come over and hit me if I don’t.”  
  
“Yah damn right I will.” Butters answers, a yawn in his voice. “It really pisses me off when you don’t do things ta’ help ya situation. You gotta take better care of yourself, Kenny.”  
  
A sigh leaves Kenny’s lips as he sits on his bed and nods, “I know, Buttercup. I have to take the bull by the horns and all that jazz, right?”  
  
“Yup, if ya don’t, you’ll only have ya self to blame!” Butters exclaims, trying his best to hide his worry through the smile he knows translates in his voice. Kenny worries him, but he’s glad the other boy comes to him for help when he needs it.  
  
“Goodnight, Leo. Thank you for always helping.” Kenny states before he lays his head down on his pillow, “I’ll text you what happens.”  
  
“Good, cause this is ma’ favorite soap opera. As the world burns, ha.” He jokes, “and Kenny? Thank _you_ for always helping.” He supplies as Kenny laughs with him, both of them hanging up.

It wasn’t the longest conversation, but it definitely helped to put things in to perspective for him. He’s grateful that he has someone like Butters in his life to guide him when he feels lost. But as he looks down at his phone, his stomach tying in knots, he isn’t quite sure how much his advice will actually help him this time.

Kenny pulls up ‘ _Tucker_ ’ on his contact list and presses -- **CALL--**.  
  
Here goes everything.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wasn't intending on writing the second half, but I did. So buckle up folks.


	2. Phone a Lover

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Taking the advice Butters had bestowed upon him, Kenny calls Craig with the intend on telling him the truth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys.
> 
> I never intended to do a second part, but I feel like it needed to be done.
> 
> I apologize for any mistakes, this is un-beta'd.

It isn’t as hard as he’s making it out to be, honestly, picking up the phone and telling someone you’ve had feelings for them for _years_ shouldn’t be this hard. _Right?_ But had it been that easy, Kenny would have managed to do it long before Butters had convinced him it was time.  Kenny had hit the **CALL** button after he had hung up with Butters but had chickened out at the last second and hung up the moment Craig’s voice had answered.

“God what is wrong with me?” Kenny wonders out loud as he throws himself backwards on to his mattress, eyes locked on the many post cards he had plastered to his ceiling.  It was a project of his, finding post cards of places he wanted to visit one day and placing them there, so they could be a constant reminder that no matter the grasp of this curse over him, _he could leave one day._

But now, here he was, staring at New York and Paris, feeling less than confident he could visit them. Because, if he couldn’t even tell one boy he liked him, how was he expecting himself to get the courage to leave South Park?

What would even happen to him? Would the curse follow him? Would he spend thousands of dollars to get to Europe only to be hit by a train and wake up back in this hell hole of a respawning point? The blond had no clue what would happen and the idea, no the fear of it, crippled him.

Kenny lets out the softest sigh as he glances down at his phone. No text message questioning why it was he called, no calls back demanding to understand why Kenny hung up on him. That jealous monster living inside him decides this is the best moment to rear its head, clawing and tugging at his insides, screaming at him ‘it’s because he’s with Tweek right now’. 

It wasn’t fair for him to be angry at Craig for that, nor Tweek for that matter. The two of them had history, be it how the town forced them into dating in fourth grade, or the years they spent actually attempting to cultivate some semblance of a real relationship. Kenny had to give it to them, if anything, they were persistent. That did nothing for the growing feelings Kenny had begun to notice over the years as his friendship with Craig grew and flourished into something beautiful and real.

Long gone were the days of hesitantly partnering up on field trips and eating lunch innocently next to each other in the cafeteria. Now they spent real time together, playing video games and exploring the many different climbable trees that outlined Starks Pond. They spent long nights talking about their dreams for the future, how Craig wanted so bad to work for Nasa, so he could continue to learn and discover new things about space and how Kenny wanted nothing more than to explore the world and learn new cultures.

They had a common goal, escaping South Park, and in that, they had bonded.

It wasn’t anyone’s fault but Kenny’s own that around their Sophomore year he had started to notice the way his heart would hammer faster when Craig walked into the room. No one was to blame but himself when he began to imagine himself in Tweek’s place at Craig’s side, jealous of the way he would gently hold his hand or call him pet names.  There was no one but him that could hold responsibility for the way his friendship shaped into something more of a ache deep down in his heart, an ache to be closer, to touch, to feel, to know Craig in ways friends don’t tread.

No, these were all issues Kenny had developed on his own. It was one sided and he had no one to damn but his own heart and mind. When had it started really? That the first thing his mind would jump to when he was on deaths door, was Craig? How would he explain to him as to why he didn’t show up to the movies when that old lady hit him with the car? How would he explain to him all the times he disappeared for days on end with no phone calls and no messages?

Why was the first thing he thought when his eyes opened and focused on a new day after his rebirth was, ‘I have to call Craig’?

Kenny’s fingers slide across his chest and find purchase with his shirt, gripping the material tightly above his heart. His face contorts as he attempts not to let the emotions currently overflowing inside of him, out into the world. 

He had finally said the words he felt so often to Butters, about feeling replaceable. So how could he even think to tell Craig his feelings? What type of life could he provide someone? He couldn’t even give them a proper friendship, let alone providing love and support for someone emotionally, when he himself was broken and frayed inside. 

No. He had to stop thinking like that. He could hear the chiding remarks from Butters in his head and knew that had he voiced this concern to him as well, that Butters would have scolded him.

‘ _A relationship is a two-way street, Kenny. It ain’t just about what you can give to someone, but what they can do to support you as well._ ’ Kenny chuckles under his breath, even the Butters in his mind had more common sense than he did sometimes.

Kenny lifts his phone, presses the **CALL** button again, and holds his breath.

There’re three rings before the phone clicks to life and Craig answers the other end, the sound of his voice sends a shiver down Kenny’s spine and he feels himself freezing up again.

“Kenny?” The boy on the other end starts and Kenny can hear the faintest hint of concern in his friend’s voice. “You called earlier but you hung up, I assumed you butt dialed me.” 

 _Aah, so he wasn’t ignoring me?_ Kenny thinks, feeling awful for ever assuming the worst of Craig.

“You know me Tucker, how else am I going to ring up my booty calls?” He pauses for Craig’s reaction to his joke and just as he assumes, it hits the mark. A soft laugh floats over the receiver into Kenny’s ear and he can’t help but smile at the sound of it.

“Right, sure.” There’s a pause before Craig sounds a little less concerned, “What’s up?”

Kenny isn’t sure how to start this conversation, so he decides to try and sabotage it for himself apparently by asking the one thing he knows he shouldn’t. “I don’t wanna take up your time, aren’t you and Tweek hanging out?”

He bites his lip as he awaits the confirmation that they are indeed, hanging out. It’s Tuesday and Tuesdays have always been ‘Vintage movie night’ between the two of them and lord knows Tweek is not one for changing routine. However, to his surprise, Craig makes a weird noise in his throat over the phone.

“No?” He starts, and Kenny is struck with the feeling that something isn’t quite right with the tone of Craig’s voice, “Why would you assume that?” 

“It’s Tuesday.” Kenny states matter-of-factly, as if this explains everything. But there’s silence on the other end, so much so that Kenny begins to ramble to fill said silence. “Tuesday? Movie night? You guys have been doing it since, shit, I don’t know. Years? I assumed you guys would be watching some stupid B-movie or some indie film no one knows the name of.”

Nerves start to fray, and anxiety starts to rise in his throat the longer the silence goes on and Kenny doesn’t understand what’s happening? Did he say something wrong?

A long sigh can almost be heard, but it’s clear that Craig has turned away from his phone to make the sound and Kenny can almost see him pinching the bridge of his nose in exasperation.

“We haven’t done that in years,” Craig answers, his voice sounding much more tired than it had appeared a minute ago, “I’m not sure why you thought we still were?”

The tiniest, ‘oh’ slips out of Kenny’s mouth and his mind is racing. What else have they not been doing for years? Kenny just… he just _assumed_? Had he been so busy with his own life, in his own insanity, that he had somehow missed the important events happening in his friend’s life?

“Kenny,” Craig’s voice knocks Kenny out of his stupor, the blond snapping back to attention. “you’ve been uh, distant this year. Are you okay?”

It was true. Kenny had pulled away and from the outside perspective, it would have appeared for no reason. It isn’t like he could explain he was doing it for Craig’s own good, that he was giving him more time to spend with Tweek, someone who could be there for him and not just disappear. 

“We’re graduating this year.” Craig states and there isn’t much else there, just that statement floating in the void. Kenny isn’t sure what that statement means to him, why he said it, so he ventures to ask as much.

“I know, you’ve got big plans, right?” He jokes, a fake laugh on his lips as his heart crushes in his chest, another reason he’s distanced himself from Craig. It wouldn’t hurt as much to watch him leave if he isn’t as close to him as he was before, right?

“You’re changing the subject, I asked if you were okay first.” The other sounds as if there’s a hint of annoyance in his tone and Kenny bites the inside of his cheek.

“I’m…” This is it. This is his opportunity to be honest.

Kenny’s eyes dart over the many post cards again and think about the words Butters said to him, how he’s the only one who can help himself. 

It’s time to take the leap, it’s time to try and change your path. Because Butters is right, Kenny is the master of his own destiny and he’ll regret it all his life if he doesn’t at least _try_.

“I’m worried,” He starts, voice smaller than before. “I’m worried about leaving town, I’m worried about us not being friends after you leave town. I’m scared that everyone will find their own paths and leave me behind, replace me, find someone new.” Kenny can hear an intake of breath from the other side of the phone, but he doesn’t stop, because he knows if he does, he’ll never be able to finish.

“I’m jealous that you and Tweek have probably made plans for going to college together, jealous that he gets to have so much time with you.” Kenny can feel his chest tightening more and more, his palm sweating as he presses them against his jeans to attempt to dry them. “I feel like I have nothing to offer anyone. I can’t find a single redeeming thing about myself that isn’t overshadowed by all of the negative. It’s why every single damn time I’ve ever attempted to have this conversation with you, I just smiled and laughed it off. Not because of you, but because of my own stupid fear of rejection.”

Craig is silent on the other end and Kenny thinks he’s digesting the words the blond has been throwing at him at rapid speed. He wants to give Craig time to think, time to respond, but he feels the word vomit and he can’t stop it.

“I hate that I have to see you every day, but I feel like you don’t really see me. I hate that I want more than this amazing friendship you’ve for some fricken reason, blessed me with. I’m greedy and selfish, and I fucking hate how I feel like I want to change that just to be able to be a better person, because I should want to change for me, but I want to change for  _you_.”

“Kenny.” Craig tries to interrupt but it’s too late, the feelings are rushing out all at once and Kenny can’t stop them from being said. The words he’s repressed for so long, flowing out like a river that’s been released from a dam.

“And it isn’t fair to you! You’re dating someone, and I shouldn’t be wishing and hoping that I could change that. Tweek is such a good dude and I don’t dislike him and somehow that makes it worse? Right? That I would like one of my friends’ boyfriends? It’s such a fucking sleazy thing to do, but hey, I’m Kenny McCormick and don’t the rumors say I’m that kinda guy anyway?”

“Kenny!” Craig tries again, but Kenny’s heart is slamming against his chest and the sound of it has made it to his ears, pounding relentlessly and drowning out Craig’s pleas to respond.

“I’m so hopelessly in love with you Craig Tucker. That’s why I’ve been avoiding you.”

There, it’s out now and there’s no taking it back.  Kenny can feel his eyes squeezing shut, his fingers griping his shirt so tightly that his knuckles are turning white.

There’s silence on the other end and Kenny can’t tell if he’s grateful for it or terrified of it. This could mark the beginning of the end of their friendship and he’s thankful for the years he’s gotten to have with the noirette before now. He knows graduation is around the corner and it’s cruel of him to spring this on the other now, but hey, at least he’ll only have a few more months to have to put up with Kenny’s face until he’s gone?

The silence is deafening now.

Kenny wants to speak, but what else can he say? What else can he do?

“I don’t want this to ruin our friendship, Craig. I don’t expect anything from you, I don’t expect anything different, or for something to change. I just, it’s something I needed to say, needed to get out.” He tries, he tries so hard to convey how much he wants this to not change anything, but the silence continues, and Kenny feels his heart shattering into a million pieces. As someone who has felt the pain of his heart exploding in his chest, he feels like he’d take that over this feeling.

At least with death it doesn’t stick, but this? This would change everything, and he feels sick to his stomach that he even thought to allow these feelings to find purchase in the real world outside of his own mind.

“…C-craig?” Kenny asks again, his eyebrows furrowed when the other continues his silence. The blond can feel the tears trying to breach from his eyes and down his cheeks, but he’s holding them back because honestly, what did he expect? He should have known this would be the way things ended, Kenny was cursed, he wasn’t allowed to have a happy ending like everyone else.

A rapping sound draws him out of his thoughts and catches him off guard. He looks up to the sound, eyes finding a figure at his window. For the briefest of seconds, he wonders if it’s Death come to mock him in his time of pain, but that thought passes when he sees a familiar blue chullo. 

“Craig?” Kenny asks as if he doesn’t recognize the boy at his window, he walks over and opens said window, confusion written all over his face. “What… the phone?” He continues, looking back to his bed where he abandoned his phone.

Craig looks entirely out of breath, as if he ran the entire way across the tracks from his house. He puts his finger up in a gesture to say, ‘hold on’, bent over, hands on his knees as he tries to catch his breath. “Fuck it’s cold out here.” He grumbles and Kenny notes that Craig isn’t even wearing a jacket.

“Holy shit dude, get in here.” Kenny starts, grabbing Craig’s arm to try and get him to come in out of the cold. He does, his long legs climbing through the window before he’s closing it and slipping off his shoes. “What are you doing here?” Kenny asks as he watches the other boy, his stomach wants to purge all of the food he’s managed to eat today his nerves are so fried, but he chokes the feeling back.

“You wouldn’t let me talk,” Craig states as if it’s the most logical reason as to why he’s at his window, “I needed you to listen to me.”

Kenny finds himself sitting on his bed and reaching to hang his phone up. He looks back at the taller boy and nods quickly. He deserves this, being told off in person. The shorter boy owes as much to Craig for ogling him for so many years and he swallows before steading himself.

“First off, you seem to be under the impression that Tweek and I are dating for some reason?” Craig pulls a face and shakes his head, “We aren’t, we haven’t been since Sophomore year.”

Kenny’s head jerks so quickly he feels like he could have given himself whiplash, “Wha—”

“I’m not finished.” Craig cuts him off and Kenny shuts up.

“It was something we decided together, but we didn’t want the town to get all up in arms again, so we just kept doing our normal shit. It helps him, to have me around, so it’s the least I can do as a friend.” Craig takes this moment to walk over, he deposits himself on Kenny’s bed next to him and folds his legs. “I haven’t made plans with Tweek, he’s taking a year off to find himself, or something about how the government forces us to go to college so they can steal our money? I’m not clear on that, you’d have to talk to him.”

A brief smile flits across Craig’s lips as he’s talking, and Kenny feels his stomach churn again, those damn butterflies flying into his chest.  “I got worried you know?” The smile melts away as Craig directs his attention to Kenny in front of him, “When you started avoiding me? But I figured you had shit to take care of. You have a hard life, you practically raise your little sister. I wasn’t about to go whining to you that I missed hanging out.” Kenny can tell this is hard for Craig, so he stays silent and allows the other a chance to speak.

“I asked Trish to talk to Karen, so I could at least know you were doing okay. But she said you’ve been pretty quiet and distant lately and it got me really…” The noirette reaches up and tugs on one of the ends of his chullo, a nervous habit that Kenny knows too well.  “Anyway, you aren’t replaceable you idiot. I don’t think the world has ever made another Kenny McCormick, and I don’t think they ever will.” 

Kenny’s eyes soften as he watches Craig struggle with his words. He knows damn well that Craig Tucker is amazing at communication, but he isn’t so great with his own feelings, just other peoples. Perhaps it was years of handling Cylde’s breakdowns and Tweek’s panic attacks, who knows. But the taller boy was never very good at expressing his own concerns and thoughts.

“So, you were worried about me?” Kenny asks, a tiny cheeky smile on his lips. Craig rolls his eyes and pushes Kenny’s shoulder, shaking his head.

“Oh my god, shut up McCormick.”

“No really, you were so worried you asked my baby sister to check on me? Oh Craig, I didn’t know you cared.” Kenny teases, his small smirk growing into a toothy grin.

To his surprise, Craig’s cheeks dust a deep scarlet and he pulls his chullo down over his face. “Why are you like this?” He grumbles, flicking Kenny off with his signature move.

The blond can feel that bubble of emotion coming back, the one that pops and covers his entire body in a warmth that radiates _Craig_. He’s missed this, their back and forth, their friendship. Kenny decides right then and there that he can survive on this alone, he doesn’t need more from Craig, as much as his heart longs for it.

“I heard you know,” Craig says as Kenny looks up from his thoughts, “the end of what you said. Before I put the phone down and ran over here.”

Kenny can feel his cheeks mirroring Craig’s, his freckles feeling red hot from the crimson flush covering his cheeks and burning, spreading up over his ears and neck. Craig had heard his confession after all, huh?

“You did?” Kenny finds his voice long enough to ask, “Um.” He doesn’t dare ask for a response, as he’s sure rejection is on the horizon. But a tiny part of himself feels hope, now that he knows Craig and Tweek haven’t actually been dating for the last two years.

Craig’s hands move, pulling the chullo off of his face, his eyes darting away from Kenny as he speaks. “You’re allowed to feel what you feel, you know? No one has the right to get angry at you for liking them, especially me.” His fingers find the frayed edges of the yellow attached to his hats tassels and he messes with them as he talks. “You, you’re like no one I’ve ever met before. You’re infuriating, annoying, irritating at times, but...” Green eyes unfocus, as if Craig isn’t looking at the yellow poof anymore but beyond it. “You’re also the most compassionate, caring individual I’ve ever known. You’re selfless and self-sacrificing, you’re incredibly loyal to your friends and I don’t think anyone could ever take your place.”

Kenny watches and listens, his eyes growing wider at every word. When Craig looks up to meet his eyes, there’s a shyness there that Kenny isn’t quite used to.

“You make me want to be better, just being around you. So, I get it, what you said, about changing for someone else. I see you working so hard for Karen and it makes me want to work harder.” Craig reaches forward and Kenny’s breath hitches in his throat when skin brushes against skin, his fingers finding Kenny’s. “You have no idea how amazing you are Kenny. You think you have nothing to give, but all you’ve done your entire life is give.”

The blond can feel them, the tears, welling in his eyes. They’re threating to spill over again and this time he allows it to happen. Craig’s lips twist with a smile as he reaches his other hand up and wipes a tear away with this thumb, caressing Kenny’s cheek at the same time.

“Stop focusing on what others want or need and look at yourself once in a while, McCormick. We all know the rumors aren’t true and the people who care about you know you better than to think you’re anything but inspiring.” The noirette leans forward, his hand tightening around Kenny’s. “I’ve wanted so bad to tell you how much I like you, Kenny. But you’ve been burdened with so much, I didn’t want to be something else on your plate.”

When Kenny realizes what Craig’s words mean, the tears double. His face contorts, and he knows he looks disgusting and ugly right now, because whoever looks attractive when they cry?

Closing the distance between them, Kenny wraps his free arm around Craig’s broad shoulders and buries his face in the crook of his neck. His first thought is strange, that Craig smells like the wilderness. Like freedom.

“I’m pretty damn sure I’m in love with you Kenny McCormick.” Craig states into Kenny’s hair, his hand stroking over his back in an attempt to calm him down. “And I don’t blame you one bit for not being able to tell me sooner, because I’m a god damn coward and it took me till right now to spit it out.” Kenny’s body shakes when Craig laughs, “Tweek’s been telling me for a year to grow a pair.”

Kenny finds himself laughing as well, the two of them are such a pair. He finds this pretty fucking funny as he slaps Craig’s back gently, the laughter just not stopping.  “What’s wrong with us?” Kenny asks, finally pulling back.

“I blame South Park.” Craig supplies, his eyes meeting Kenny’s as he pulls his sleeve over his hand and wipes at the tears running down his face. “Or our parents, maybe both.”

Kenny’s lips shift, a goofy smile appearing as he leans forward and places his forehead against Craig’s. “I blame myself, I can be pretty dumb.”

“Yeah, I mean, look at who you hang out with.” Craig answers, their voices lowering as they look into each other’s eyes, smiles mirrored on their expressions.

“Rude,” Kenny whispers as he moves forward, his lips barely brushing against Craig’s. He’s sure the other can taste the salt from his tears, but by any indication of the way he surges forward to press into the kiss, he doesn’t mind.

The last coherent thought Kenny thinks before his mind devolves into: ( _Craig’s lips, Craig’s hands, Craig, Craig, Craig, Craig)_ is that he’s going to need to call Butters later and thank him for the best advice he could have ever received.


End file.
